Thursday, October 25, 2007
Aw! My heart
Anyone who has taken drugs for ADD knows they can be dangerous for the heart.
There’s going to be a big study on the effects on the heart in the US , which is good I say.
I was taking Ritalin but I’ve stopped taking it for about 2 months because of heart concerns. My blood pressure is through the roof, 150/90 (I’m 20something, not fat), I don’t blame Ritalin but it didn’t help. I was doing exercise before my period and got really bad palpitations which scared me. I’m pretty sure I was having bad heartburn, but I had to get myself checked out, and went straight to the cardiologist.
I was taking Effexor before and birth control, and anyone will tell you I’m one of the most jumpy people they know. A major reason I don’t watch horror movies. I’m very anxious, with social anxiety and generalized anxiety and I have a list of medications I’ve been taking, lorazepam (tranquilizers), sertraline, Besitran (Zoloft US ), Prozac, and innumerable stuff to help me sleep. In Spain, it’s so easy to get tranquilizers and I had stupid docs, every time I went there, they just threw tranquilizers at me instead of dealing with me. You’ll probably get stabbed and they will say you are stressed and give you tranquilizers. After a while, I simply didn’t take this medication.
I left public health for my private insurance after I was feeling very suicidal, and my public doc told me to take tila (limeflowers ) for my nerves! Stupid bitch! I was standing in front of windows and debating whether I should throw myself out, and eyeing passing trucks thinking what if I simply didn’t move as the truck came down. And take fucking tila. I’m still so mad, I’m wondering if I should make an official complaint. So I went to a private psychiatrist who prescribed Effexor.
Effexor is a bitch. It raises your blood pressure for one, and I’d been asking whether I should get checked out. Oh, I was young, no need to worry said the doctor. And being ADD, I didn’t follow up. And now look at me.
Here it does say it’s transient, not in my case. It’s lingered for me. My blood pressure wasn’t this bad B/E (before effexor) and I’ve been really stressed. B/E it wasn’t the first time I was suicidal.
Prozac stopped my out of control eating, I was hungry all the time, but it didn’t do anything for my mood and neither did Zoloft. I did notice I was a bit more zombielike and apathetic on Prozac.
Effexor did balance my moods, cause I wasn’t just suicidally depressed, I was raging, and extremely irritable and I lost weight on one particular generic kind. Now that I’m still wondering about, they were both the same, 75mg, but one made me lose my appetite. I wasn’t interested in food and that was fantastic. The other one (Dopubal, Dobupal, I always get confused) didn’t affect my appetite. Before taking Effexor, I was throwing up on a regular basis, I was losing weight and then started on Effexor which wiped my appetite, I looked so cute!
My thighs, the bane of my life were slim and slender… yea, yea, anorexia/bulimia is not cool but I felt so in control, and that’s a feeling I’m not used to in all the years on this planet. I didn’t inhale food and finish everything placed in front of me. No impulse eating, control! I wasn’t a full bulimic as I wasn’t eating insane amounts, I just threw up when I ate something calorific which was most things.
So I’m waiting for more results from the cardiologist, hope it works out fine. I have to get a blood test and X-ray and keep forgetting to do them. Writing this out in my blog reminded me I had to call the hospital and find out when to go and I did :-)
Sunday, February 24, 2008
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