http://www.adhdmarriage.com/node/84
"One of the biggest differences between people with ADD and those without is that the non-ADD brain creates a hierarchy of ideas all the time. Things come into your brain and they get put into an order without your even knowing it. What the person in front of you is saying is more important than the bird chirping in the next tree or the squirrel running across the path nearby, for example. We don’t think about this as it happens – it just does. But next time you are in a conversation with someone, or reading a book, or doing just about anything, stop and think about all of the stimulus around you that your brain is very kindly blocking out for you so that you can stay focused on the task at hand.
The ADD brain doesn’t do this very naturally. I can find myself annoyed when I am in the middle of saying something to my daughter and she suddenly starts playing with the ends of her hair…or picks up a magazine to look at the pictures…or (fill in the blank). It’s not that she doesn’t want to hear what I say (I hope!) but rather that something else just caught her attention. I know enough about ADD that I am able to bring her back to the conversation with a simple (nicely stated, not mean!) “Can you look at me for a few minutes more and leave your hair?” She knows I’m not mad when I say this, just trying to finish my thought, and so she drops the hair and refocuses on me. (If she thought I were mad, her response would be very different - probably defiant - which is why how distractibility is handled by the non-ADD partner is so critical to good communication.)"
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